A friend recently asked me what I think about during the many hours a day when I’m not very busy with my writing or cooking chores. And surprise, surprise, I said: Donald Trump, a person I have no nice thoughts about whatsoever. He is a bad man and a bad president. I don’t want my life to end before we have gotten rid of him.
I also think about death. I equate my death with two things: keeping safe from the coronavirus and keeping safe from Donald Trump. In my mind, they go hand in hand. In fact Donald Trump is the reason the people of our country have been so affected by the virus – Donald Trump lied that it was a problem when it first came to the forefront. He didn’t want a nasty thing like a virus pandemic to wreck his chances of getting reelected. So he pushed questions and information about it away. Even now when we have had over one hundred thousand deaths in the United States, he still won’t talk about it. He says and does anything he can to divert our attention away from it.
But that’s not possible for the many who are still trying to stay safe at home. We have to pay attention. Right now I have no idea when or if I will ever venture out again. In fact, just yesterday I postponed a mammogram appointment again because I’m not ready to get out into the world. I rescheduled for two months from now – and we’ll see how I feel about it then. At least I got a smog check for my car so that when I actually take it out for a real ride again it will have the proper paperwork.
So this brings me back to death. My husband is eighty-three and I’m eighty. Both of us could die soon – or live a long time. I sure don’t want to die without doing some more things on my bucket list. I still want to travel, I still want to go to the theater and opera, I still want to sit down and have a leisurely meal in a restaurant – not food brought in as we did this week to celebrate our fiftieth anniversary. Just a few simple things that I want to do before I die. And of course when I do die it would be nice to have family around for my burial.
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